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TV: Jessica Jones 1-3 Review

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ok, so Mark started watching Jessica Jones last night and I know about it and you all know how I heckle everything, and this was particularly amazing, so here goes:

EPISODE 1-3
David Tennant is a superhuman with mind control. WAIT!!! Scratch that. David Tennant is a rapist that uses mind control. The reason that has been changed is because instead of collecting money, power, fame, etc. he uses his powers to get laid and to get revenge on anyone preventing him from getting laid.

Please do not tell me that 'oh, well he uses his 'girlfriends' for doing bad things... Well guess what? So do a lot of guys and they don't have to be superhuman, so as far as I can tell David Tennant's abilities are centered around the lonliness of his crotch. Maybe that's why everything's purple.

Jessica Jones is a TV show about David Tennants magic dick.
While being unintentionally hilarious, its not doing what it set out to do. They try to offset everything by adding seriously creepy rapey scenes to make you feel bad about it and I'm not sure it's enough to make it work.

It's like watching David Bowie in Labyrinth and knowing he's a kidnapper and a rapist and STILL getting a cocky grin on your face whenever that package swaggers into the room.

It's Labyrinth for Grownups without Bowie's package and with David Tennants purple magic wang.

Of course I'm going to keep watching. ARE YOU KIDDING?!?!

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