Not the one (teshara) wrote,
Not the one

ok, so I am in officially the worst mental state I've been in in years and omg the ideas for writing are flying.

To sum up:

bad root canal
3 days of violent puking
painkillers that didnt work
another tenant abandoned a cat (shes at our house and Toby is NOT pleased)
our house is a split election and it's getting muddy in here. I mean, I'm surprised its only happening in the last couple days, but still. Time out until the tooth is better. Jeez.
I found out my mom went into cardiac failure in August and no one told us because they thought we were on vacation and didnt want to worry us. She was there for a week. WE WERE HOME!!!
It's how Pat died. I'm a fucking mess I cussed a blue streak up and down at my mom.
I'd think I was going to hell if I didnt realize afterwards that I was channeling grandpa. woah. I didn't even know that was in there.
My bio mom went all softie last night and dumped everything I was thinking out of my head because she's good at that and I cried a lot. I was on skype for 4 hours wailing away about my tooth and mom.

So today I talk to dentist again and they send me to the ER, but we went to immediate care instead. I get drugs. I get an IV. I get a container of applesauce.

My blood pressure is through the roof.

I haven't written seriously in months.

And I get a vision that one of my sirens wasnt kissed by a siren, but a water wyvern and can harness the power of the Dragons Daughter complete with whipping tail, giant wings, claws, and teeth, and a golden crown of bone that sprouts from the crown of her head.

Apparently I suck at writing unless I'm a complete spaz.

Good to know.

Tags: real life, sick, total loser, writing
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